My Eulogy

#1 · April 19, 2024, 6:06 pm

Quote from AshleighBee on April 19, 2024, 6:06 pm
I thought I might share the eulogy I read at the Memorial Service as well as include the photos I printed out and distributed to those who attended in person.

"

Aunt Sharon was THE coolest Aunt to ever grace this planet. She thoroughly blessed and enriched the lives of anyone who cared enough to reach out to her. Despite having no kids of her own, she was an amazing influence on the lives of her nieces. She took us all on expensive ass trips when we turned 16! I saw my first, and to date, only Broadway show with her in New York. She centered those trips around our interests and made sure we had once in a lifetime experiences. My parents made a damn good choice naming her Godmother for my sister and me.

She was one of the kindest people I met, and really humble about her kindness. I didn’t find out until after her death just how many charities she was involved in. I do know that when her dad passed away, she didn’t hesitate to take care of his dog. I do know that despite being allergic to cats, she was never mean to them and just gently nudged them away from her. I do know that she spent hours throwing the ball for our endless-energy dog when she visited. I do know that when I told her my son had Autism and ADHD, she researched his condition and made sure to be as respectful of it as possible. He never did hug her, but both of them were okay with that. I do know that I could hear the smile in her voice whenever she picked up when I called. I do know how thoroughly and carefully she gave advice. I do know that I could hear the genuine emotion in her voice when she hung up and told me she loved me.

When I was cleaning out her house, I found a package I had mailed her nearly 20 years ago. I had spent my own money to pick out a bath set for her, and Mom helped me mail it to her. She never did open it. A friend of mine pointed out that she was so fiercely independent that she preferred to buy herself anything she wanted or needed, but the fact that I cared enough to get her a gift at all was so important to her, she kept it, package and all. Given the number of other unopened presents I found throughout her house, I do think that was correct.

Aunt Sharon was an incredible role model. She knew what she wanted from life, and she worked hard until she got it. She graduated with two degrees and enough credits for a third but didn’t take it because she “didn’t want to seem unfocused”. She carefully saved and invested so she could afford to travel where she wanted to go and worked so hard at her job. She knew all the ins and outs of saving, investing, and protecting her assets and was happy to share her knowledge with anyone who listened. Her independence was both a blessing and a curse. She worked hard for anything she wanted, but found it difficult to rely on others for emotional support.

Aunt Sharon was also a queen when it came to personal boundaries. I know there are some people out there who thought she wasn’t a great person for the way she enforced her boundaries, but it’s a trait I thoroughly admire. When someone disrespected her enough, that was it, she was done, all ties cut. No ‘what ifs’, ‘maybes’, ‘unlesses’, or ‘re-dos’. In a world where destroying yourself to please others is the accepted approach, I think we can all take a page from her book and enforce our boundaries for our own sakes.

Aunt Sharon was far more than an aunt to me. Despite the physical distance, she was one of my closest relatives. We bonded over so much. Our sense of humor aligned, as did a lot of our interests. I know I am incredibly lucky to say that I have no regrets over how our relationship played out over the years. We may not have talked often, but it was often enough for us both, and we were happy. The only regrets I have is that I had to say goodbye too soon, and I couldn’t say goodbye to her while she was still alive.

I loved her, deeply and thoroughly. Snarky and kind, annoying behaviors and sweet. She had a personality as full-bodied and flavorful as her favorite wines. I am usually pretty good with words, but I cannot express how much I will miss having her in my life."

I thought I might share the eulogy I read at the Memorial Service as well as include the photos I printed out and distributed to those who attended in person.

Aunt Sharon was THE coolest Aunt to ever grace this planet. She thoroughly blessed and enriched the lives of anyone who cared enough to reach out to her. Despite having no kids of her own, she was an amazing influence on the lives of her nieces. She took us all on expensive ass trips when we turned 16! I saw my first, and to date, only Broadway show with her in New York. She centered those trips around our interests and made sure we had once in a lifetime experiences. My parents made a damn good choice naming her Godmother for my sister and me.

She was one of the kindest people I met, and really humble about her kindness. I didn’t find out until after her death just how many charities she was involved in. I do know that when her dad passed away, she didn’t hesitate to take care of his dog. I do know that despite being allergic to cats, she was never mean to them and just gently nudged them away from her. I do know that she spent hours throwing the ball for our endless-energy dog when she visited. I do know that when I told her my son had Autism and ADHD, she researched his condition and made sure to be as respectful of it as possible. He never did hug her, but both of them were okay with that. I do know that I could hear the smile in her voice whenever she picked up when I called. I do know how thoroughly and carefully she gave advice. I do know that I could hear the genuine emotion in her voice when she hung up and told me she loved me.

When I was cleaning out her house, I found a package I had mailed her nearly 20 years ago. I had spent my own money to pick out a bath set for her, and Mom helped me mail it to her. She never did open it. A friend of mine pointed out that she was so fiercely independent that she preferred to buy herself anything she wanted or needed, but the fact that I cared enough to get her a gift at all was so important to her, she kept it, package and all. Given the number of other unopened presents I found throughout her house, I do think that was correct.

Aunt Sharon was an incredible role model. She knew what she wanted from life, and she worked hard until she got it. She graduated with two degrees and enough credits for a third but didn’t take it because she “didn’t want to seem unfocused”. She carefully saved and invested so she could afford to travel where she wanted to go and worked so hard at her job. She knew all the ins and outs of saving, investing, and protecting her assets and was happy to share her knowledge with anyone who listened. Her independence was both a blessing and a curse. She worked hard for anything she wanted, but found it difficult to rely on others for emotional support.

Aunt Sharon was also a queen when it came to personal boundaries. I know there are some people out there who thought she wasn’t a great person for the way she enforced her boundaries, but it’s a trait I thoroughly admire. When someone disrespected her enough, that was it, she was done, all ties cut. No ‘what ifs’, ‘maybes’, ‘unlesses’, or ‘re-dos’. In a world where destroying yourself to please others is the accepted approach, I think we can all take a page from her book and enforce our boundaries for our own sakes.

Aunt Sharon was far more than an aunt to me. Despite the physical distance, she was one of my closest relatives. We bonded over so much. Our sense of humor aligned, as did a lot of our interests. I know I am incredibly lucky to say that I have no regrets over how our relationship played out over the years. We may not have talked often, but it was often enough for us both, and we were happy. The only regrets I have is that I had to say goodbye too soon, and I couldn’t say goodbye to her while she was still alive.

I loved her, deeply and thoroughly. Snarky and kind, annoying behaviors and sweet. She had a personality as full-bodied and flavorful as her favorite wines. I am usually pretty good with words, but I cannot express how much I will miss having her in my life."

Uploaded files:

#2 · April 19, 2024, 7:05 pm

Thank you for sharing this with us!